Cinderella . . . Cinderella

Why do I feel like I am Cinderella? Having to do everything, not feeling like I am being appreciated. I just I don't even know what's true any more in my life. LIke I am so torn between fantancy and real life. Anyways. Confusion is starting to set in.

Life Life Life . . . .

So yes. Life.
You can't live with out, But you mad at it.
How is that even possible?

This is one thing I have found myself thinking about so much lately. I just can't seem to figure out things right now. Never mind thinking about things, I just can't think seem to think or concentrate on anything. My grades are low and I need to bring them up, but I don't know where I am going wrong.

Anyways. Thats my life in a nut shell. lol.

Greg . . . . check this out

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anyways. ya
lol
i am using it right now

Mighty to Save - Michel W. Smith

Everyone needs compassion,
Love that's never failing;
Let mercy fall on me.
Everyone needs forgiveness,
The kindness of a Saviour;
The Hope of nations.

Saviour,
He can move the mountains,
My God is Mighty to save,
He is Mighty to save.
Forever,
Author of salvation,
He rose and conquered the grave,
Jesus conquered the grave.

So take me as You find me,
All my fears and failures,
Fill my life again.
I give my life to follow
Everything I believe in,
Now I surrender.

My Saviour,
He can move the mountains,
My God is Mighty to save,
He is Mighty to save.
Forever,
Author of salvation,
He rose and conquered the grave,
Jesus conquered the grave. (x2)

Shine your light and let the whole world see,
We're singing for the glory of the risen King...Jesus (x2)

My Saviour,
He can move the mountains,
My God is Mighty to save,
He is Mighty to save.
Forever,
Author of salvation,
He rose and conquered the grave,
Jesus conquered the grave. (x2)

Shine your light and let the whole world see,
We're singing for the glory of the risen King...Jesus. (x4)

I hate . . . . . .

I hate having those huge realizations.
They always happen at the worst times.
I always have the "huge" ones all at one time.
Usually two or more at a time.
LOL
Anyways . . . .

WHY. .

Why do certain songs make you cry?
I can't listen to certain songs. LOL . . . .
Anyways, does this happen to you?
Let me know . . . . If you want to that is. :p

Cinderella - Steven Curtis Chapman.

She spins and she sways

To whatever song plays

Without a care in the world

And I'm sitting here wearing

The weight of the world on my shoulders

It's been a long dayAnd there's still work to do

She's pulling at me

Saying "Dad, I need you

There's a ball at the castle

And I've been invited

And I need to practice my dancing

Oh, please, Daddy, please?

"So I will dance with Cinderella

While she is here in my arms

'Cause I know something the prince never knew

Oooooh, I will dance with Cinderella

I don't wanna miss even one song

'Cause all too soon the clock will strike midnight

And she'll be gone...

She says he's a nice guy and I'd be impressed

She wants to know if I approve of her dress

She says, "Dad, the prom is just one week away

And I need to practice my dancing

Oh, please, Daddy, please?"

So I will dance with Cinderella

While she is here in my arms

'Cause I know something the prince never knew

Ooh-oh ooh-oh I will dance with Cinderella don't want to miss even one song

'Cause all too soon the clock will strike midnight

And she'll be goneShe will be gone

Well, she came home today with a ring on her hand

Just glowing and telling us all they had planned

She says, "Dad, the wedding's still six months away

But I need to practice my dancing

Oh, please, Daddy, please?"

So I will dance with Cinderella

While she is here in my arms

'Cause I know something the prince never knew

Ooh-oh ooh-oh I will dance with Cinderella

I don't want to miss even one song

'Cause all too soon the clock will strike midnight

And she'll be gone

Sorry the next post is sooo long

Gotta Be Somebody - Nickleback

This time I wonder what it feels like

To find the one in this life

The one we all dream of

But dreams just aren't enough

So I´ll be waiting for the real thing.

I'll know it by the feeling.

The moment when we´re meeting

Will play out like a scene straight off the silver screen

So I`ll be holdin’ my breath

Right up to the end

Until that moment when I find the one that I'll spend forever with

`Cause nobody wants to be the last one there.

'Cause everyone wants to feel like someone cares.

Someone to love with my life in their hands.

There`s gotta be somebody for me like that.

`Cause nobody wants to go it on their own

And everyone wants to know they´re not alone.

Somebody else that feels the same somewhere.

There`s gotta be somebody for me out there.

Tonight out on the street out in the moonlight

And damn it this feels too right

It´s just like Déjà Vu

Me standin’ here with you

So I´ll be holdin`my breath

Could this be the end?

Is it that moment when I find the one that I spend forever with?

‘Cause nobody wants to be the last one there

'Cause everyone wants to feel like someone cares.

Someone to love with my life in their hands.

There´s gotta be somebody for me like that.

`Cause nobody wants to go it on their own

And everyone wants to know they´re not alone.

Is there somebody else that feels the same somewhere?

There`s gotta be somebody for me out there.

You can´t give up!

When you're

Lookin´ for a diamond in the rough

Because you never know when it shows up

Make sure you´re holdin` on

‘Cause it could be the one, the one you´re waiting on

‘Cause nobody wants to be the last one there.

And everyone wants to feel like someone cares.

Someone to love with my life in their hands.

There has gotta be somebody for me Ohhhhhh.

Nobody wants to go it on their own

And everyone wants to know they´re not alone.

Is there somebody else that feels the same somewhere?

There `s gotta be somebody for me out there.

Nobody wants to be the last one there

And everyone wants to feel like someone cares.

Is there somebody else that feels the same somewhere?

There has gotta be somebody for me out there.

Looking through folders on my computer . . . . . . . .

I have no idea, where or even if I made this up. . . . so ya. . enjoy, a little more of a glance into my life.

So sweet the blood
That trembles on my lips
Staining my innocence
And tearing me further
Apart from reality
What new hope is
Has lost itself in my heart.
Too empty for even tears
To feel nothing again
Screams of pain ring
Within my own mind
My cries for help
Going to nothing.
So smile for the world
They expect your life
And give you nothing.
Fight it, don’t let them win.
Let your hands feel the blade
Run across smooth skin
And drift quietly
To a deeper nothingness

my Night was . . . . . . .

Ya so as you read in my previous blog, i had the memorial last night.
I do have to admit though, it was hard during the whole time on me.
I guess i am not as strong as i thought i was.

But no, it became really hard for me when my cousin ended up leaving to drive back home.

I guess, i started to trust her about a lot of things, and it was just hard to see her go.

The night, after my dad and i got back to the hotel, was hard. i guess, i just really didn't know what or how i was feeling.
I was confused, but not at the same time.

i don't know, i am still sorting things out. . . . .

so ya finally this wekend is starting to make sence . . . . . . I think.

So yes. i was at my aunts memorial today.
I left my house with my dad at 7:45 and made it up to sundridge for 1:30.
the memorial was nice. i feel like i can now semi move on in life.
I guess before now, i was mad and unsure about what had happened about 3 or 4 years ago. I don't know.
All i know, is now I am starting to get closure and i am not as depressed.
I do have to say though, its all cause of my cousin Kelly. . . . . . . there are no words to express my gratitude thankfulness, and love i feel for her. . . . she has truly been able to get me out of this rut, i have been in for so so long. . . . . thanks kelly. love you so so much. . . . . . (L)

so ya this weekend . . . .

so ya this weekend i am heading up to Sundridge for my aunts memorial. so ya i get to take a 6 hour drive (it will probably end up being like 7 or 8) tomorrow morning. I am excited. but ya. It will be hard on me. as everything is. lol.

why?

why does it always seem like when i start to get my life on track, I fall off like a train falls off of the tracks?

Boyfriend(s) ?

I seem to be very vulnerable these days.

I always seem to be semi messing my life over.

Why is it always me who ends up screwing up?

There just seems to be so many other people this could happen to.

So why is it always me?

ONE LINE POEM- BY ME AND BANANA

ONCE THERE WAS A LITTLE GIRL,
WHO HAD ROSE PEARL
AND SHE WORE IT DAILY
AND PROUDY
SHE WENT TO SCHOOL ONE DAY
AND TRIPPED ON HER WAY
THE POOR ROSE PEARL FELL
TO WHERE, SHE COULD NOT TELL
WHERE IT WAS OR WHERE SHE COULD GET A NEW ONE
SO SHE CRIED TILL SOMEONE
CAME AND TOOK HER AWAY
TO A STORE TO FIND A NEW ONE
SHE CRIED WITH JOY, AND THANKED THE KIND GIRL
FOR HER LOVE AND KINDNESS
AND THIS IS THE END OF OUR SILLINESS

YA ! ! ! ! !

I'm going to Roxanna's tonight ! ! ! ! !
I haven't seen her in like 2 weeks.
I miss her :'(
LOL.

Why is life so complicated ?

Life is so over rated.
It is so complicated.
Why?
Does anybody know?
Please tell me.
(before I go insane) LOL. . . . JK

my back hurts ! ! ! ! ! ! !

I don't know why, but for the last little while, my back has been killing me.
It's so weird.
All I can say, is that it feels so nice when it cracks.
Which is almost all the time

i am such a jerk

So I am sitting in my basement, and I started texting some one.
I suddenly noticed that I am such a jerk.
I also noticed that I have a bad habit, of being very wanting my way.
Especially now after everything that has happened in the past 2 weeks.
Anywho, I am getting through.

So ya........ i dont know what to do

I am so confused about the whole thing.
I dont know what to do.
I guess I'll have to wait and be patient.
It's really hard, but i think it wll get better.

Projects, essays, and fun?

So ya during the school year you never have time for fun. Why is that?
Any other time, your board. But not during the school year. Why is that?
During Christmas/summer break, i can never find enough to do, but it seems to go by so fast. Why is that?
I never seems to have a life out side of school, but i dont really mind that much.
All it means is that i am keeping my marks up, and working my way toward graduation and university.